Sunday, June 18, 2023

"Testing the Waters"

So far a gigantic sample of (eight) Twitter followers tells me that I could pull 50% of the vote as a presidential candidate, with another 12.5% up for grabs if I made changes to my prospective campaign platform.

By my count, there are 481 electoral votes (from a total of 538, with 270 needed to win) available to write-in candidates. While 32 of those states require paperwork of one kind or another for a candidate's supporters' votes to actually be tallied, that doesn't seem like an impossibly high bar for even a sub-$5k campaign to get over.

And a plurality in fewer than 15 of the states that don't even require paperwork could get me to 270. For example, New York, Illinois, Missouri, Wisconsin (those are the four origin states of the foods mentioned in the initial campaign platform), California, Texas, Michigan, Ohio, New York, New Hampshire, Virginia, North Carolina, Georgia, and Florida would get me to 272 electoral votes.

I suppose I'd have to spend some money on food and photography, so as to have photos of myself tucking in to all the dishes I want to require federally funded dining facilities to serve. Preferably surrounded by supporters also enjoying said foods. Which might be tough, both in terms of either getting certain of the foods shipped to or prepared in Gainesville or traveling to the places where they're easily available, and in terms of finding enough supporters for credible "campaign event" presentation.

How far would I willing to bend on the terms of the campaign platform? Well, certainly as far allowing federally funded dining facilities to offer vegan/vegetarian takes on the included dishes. And possibly to adding other dishes, working out a formula for the requirements (e.g. a different kind of pizza can be offered each day, not necessarily all of them every day), etc. It's a work in progress on which I am willing both to be convinced and to bow to pressure if the pressure represents key voting blocs. 

Fortunately (or not), I wouldn't have to please Louisiana's jambalaya and po-boy lobby, as write-in votes aren't permitted there. But I could add one or both of those dishes just to see if I could spark a voter rebellion demanding the write-in vote.

Q: At what point have the people spoken?
A: Whenever a politician decides he's heard them say what he wanted to hear.

Which is not, I think, just yet. Eight Twitter followers is a small sample. And of course I'd like to hear the thoughts of my closest advisors. Including you.

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