Sunday, December 08, 2019

Lyrics: Five-Finger Discount on Love

I haven't recorded this yet, both because I'm awaiting some recording facilitation gear and because I'm still messing with it -- but since I put out everything I write under a Creative Commons Public Domain Dedication, feel free to do your own thing with it if you like (yes, pun intended). My conception of it is either 8-bar blues or vocal over a drone blues riff.

I'm putting it behind the "read more" wall because, as you might guess from the title, it's a bit racy and not intended for the children.


Verse 1:

My mama told me once, my mama told me twice
You don't want that gonorrhea, you don't want those pubic lice
Just get yourself a tube of lotion, you don't need no latex glove
To grab yourself a five-finger discount on love

Verse 2:

You can do it in your room or out back in the alley
Way up high on the hill or  down deep in the valley
You can be looking at a centerfold or stars so high above
When you grab that five-finger discount on love


Well, you can stroke it
And you can poke it
Yes you can squeeze it
Just aim to please it
No need to train it
Or to explain it
Just go and drain it
Five-finger discount on love

Verse 3:

I really dig a willing woman who wants to take me for spin
But it costs money to go out and so I'm usually stayin' in
I've bought a dozen kinds of lotion, I don't need no latex glove
To grab myself a five-finger discount on love

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