Wordle 1169 Hint

Hint: If you're a little teapot, you have this opposite your handle.

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First Letter: S

Sum 41 Friday

"So am I still waiting?"

Yes. Hoping I get the new bike in time to spend several weekend hours breaking it in.

The various accessories I've ordered continue to trickle in (this morning, I ordered a little basic toolkit and a tire plugging kit -- I always used to carry such things on bicycles, but never got around to getting them for the 50cc scooter).

That $4 pannier seems to be better than the $4 price would suggest. I wouldn't be disappointed if I had paid, say, $14 for it instead. But I do plan to upgrade from it at some point.

Speaking of the 50cc, it's still parked in town and I need to go bring it home today. I rode it into town when Tamara was at the ER, but we drove home together in her vehicle.

Wordle 1168 Hint

Hint: Hey, Jack -- Kipling says you twist the truth to make a trap for fools.

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First Letter: K

Wordle 1167 Hint

Hint: When the teacher says ...

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First Letter: F

From The Latin ...

"Gastritis" seems to mean "we don't know what causes your heart rate to crash to 40 and your blood pressure to bottom out, but since it's accompanied by nausea, here, have some famotidine as a participation trophy for your 14-hour ER wait."

(The "you" is Tamara, who was sent to the ER by her boss yesterday with the same symptoms as last time).

I won't be missing a Garrison Center column this time, but I think I'll go with Friday/Sunday instead of Thursday/Monday. I was in that approximately 5-degrees-fahrenheit ER for 13 of the 14 hours, after racing the 50cc scooter into town in a downpour then getting splashed by a passing 18-wheeler, with no dry clothes to change into. So I'm a little tired too.

Wordle 1166 Hint

Hint: If you want to solve today's Wordle you're going to need to loosen up and display some flexibility.

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First Letter: L

I don't have the bike yet, but various accessories are here or on their way

Things that have arrived (where there are links, they are not affiliate links):

• A package of "monitor" valve stem caps for tires -- the tip is green if your tire pressure is good, then shows yellow and finally red if the tire is low. I bought a package of eight from Amazon -- they'll be used on cars as well, unless they're crap. I'm not as timely about checking tire pressure as I should be.
• A pair of motorcycle gloves from Temu.
• A pair of knee pads/braces from Temu (these are just fabric and are worn under the pants -- I have fairly bad knees and I want additional padding in case I lay the bike down).

Things that are on the way:

• An alarm with remote from Walmart. Battery powered, not wired-to-bike.
• A "modular" full-face helmet from Walmart. I'll probably continue to wear my half-helmet around town during the summer weather, but the modular for cold weather and longer trips.
• A handlebar mounted phone holder from Temu, and a pair of cables from Amazon (as well as zip-ties -- the bike has a USB port and I'll probably be charging the phone whenever I'm riding unless there's something else I need USB for).
• A (probably counterfeit) ProTaper handlebar pad from Temu.
• A motorcycle cover from Amazon -- I may eventually buy one of those fabric-with-frame "garages," but this was cheap and I want something ASAP.
• A seat cover from Amazon (depending on how much I like this bike, I may have the seat reupholstered locally in real leather at some point, but for now I want to protect the existing seat).
• A 750ml fuel bottle from Amazon to carry on longer trips so that if I run out of gas I have a little to get me to the nearest station.
• A little cargo net from Amazon. I'll keep that wrapped around the tiny (for now) rear rack so that if I need to carry something unexpectedly I have it.
• A set of panniers from AliExpress. I'm not expecting much from them. My son needed an additional two or three bucks on an order to get a discount (of more than two or three bucks), and these were about $4. They're supposedly canvas, but I'll believe that when I see it. I'll probably end up with something like these Kemimoto bags on Amazon. But maybe a cheaper version.

Other things not bike-exclusive, but kind of because of the bike, are also on their way, including a new keychain, a pair of faux combat boots that I wanted anyway but will definitely wear for riding, and a wallet with a chain because I've been meaning to get one for years -- mainly because the pockets on the Thai Fisherman Pants I wear pretty much any time I'm not biking are very loose and things fall out of them at inopportune moments. In fact, I'm kind of in general clothing transition right now, and may do a post on that some time soon.

I'm Seizing The Opportunity ...

... created by the requirement that I basically completely empty my intestines for that colonoscopy.

I'm trying to not be so ambitious that I can't sustain it, so I've just targeted two goals:

1. Having  a serving of yogurt each morning for breakfast; and
2. Avoiding "highly processed" cold cuts.

Not saying that I'll never eat bologna or hot dogs again, but I'm avoiding them completely for now so as to break the habit. As for the yogurt, I figure a good deal of the important intestinal flora/fauna got taken out in the gastric holocaust and I might as well replace them with yogurt rather than with some kind of "probiotic" pill.

Wordle 1165 Hint

Hint: Fancy hat, but rather heavy on the head.

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First Letter: C

Tarantino Gets It Partly Right

Quentin Tarantino on the Rust set shooting:

The armorer is 90 percent responsible for everything that happens when it comes to that gun,” Tarantino said. “But, but, but, but, but, but the actor is 10 percent responsible." “It’s a gun,” he continued. “You are a partner in the responsibility to some degree.”

In my view, the responsibility factor adds up to more than 100%, because:

When you pick up a gun, point it at something or someone, and pull the trigger, you are 100% responsible for what happens as a result. Period.

Other people may bear this or that responsibility/liability/etc. preceding yours and above/beyond yours. The armorer has a job, and the armorer does that job or doesn't. Whoever hires the crew either selects a responsible armorer or doesn't. Whoever's in charge of the set either controls it well or doesn't. But again:

When you pick up a gun, point it at something or someone, and pull the trigger, you are 100% responsible for what happens as a result. Period.

The only except to that is small children or those who are cognitively disabled so as to inherently not understand what it is they're doing. In which case their guardians or helpers are responsible for keeping guns out of their hands.

I like guns. I'm not afraid of guns. But I don't like, and do fear, people who get it into their heads that someone else is responsible for their actions -- not only, but especially, where guns are involved.

Not Cancer

The single polyp they removed was a tubular adenoma.

Tubular adenomas aren’t cancerous and they aren’t likely to become cancer. -- Cleveland Clinic

Back To An Old Idea ...

There are commercially available "hitch tents" and other variants for vans and SUVs. When I rode a bicycle, I wanted something similar, but never found it, and never quite successfully invented a working model myself.

Here's your basic pup tent:

The version I want would come in a stuff sack that it never full detaches from, and the bag would have straps for mounting to a bicycle or motorcycle rack. Open the bag, pull out a bundle, unfold it. A collapsible ridge poll sewn into the top line with an elbow at the far end and a collapsible top to bottom poll and attached guy-line. The pegs would likewise remain attached to the bottom hems. Might even be able to manage without the ridge pole.

Nothing to lose. All the parts are attached to each other. You'd open the bag, pull out the bundle, stretch it out behind the bike, fit the internal polls together, and peg the guy-line and tent sides into the ground. Boom, you'd be camping.

Next morning, pull the pegs up, collapse the poles, and stuff the whole thing back in the bag ... while the bike is warming up. Strap on anything else that's not already mounted on the bike, ride away.

It seems to me there'd be a bit of a market for such a thing. Dirt/adventure bikers who like to get out into the wilderness and stay a little while. Long-distance riders who prefer quick overnight camps to expensive hotel stays. Etc.

If I don't find one to buy pre-made, I will eventually perfect the idea myself, and likely publish the blueprint as an "instructable" kind of thing.

Wordle 1164 Hint

Hint: Abraham Van Helsing keeps one with his hammer.

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First Letter: S

Wordle 1163 Hint

Hint: One kind has wheels, the other kind has a blade.

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First Letter: S

Midweek

The new bike is supposed to arrive at the shop on Tuesday. If so, it should be ready on Wednesday. These things arrive on pallets, mostly assembled, at the dealership, where they get their final assembly and the once-over (based on various sources, it's likely just a matter of mounting the handlebars, front wheel, etc.). I trust this particular shop to do a good job of that both because I've dealt with them before and because their primary market is college students whose parents would raise legal hell if e.g. the handlebars came off in Little Johnny's hand and he bruised an elbow.

When I ordered the bike, they said they would try to get me the version with yellow fairings (it comes in other colors as well), but wouldn't know if it was in stock until they asked. They now tell me that yellow was available. Hooray!

I just ordered a "modular" helmet -- full face, but it flips up instead of being one piece -- from Walmart. It will arrive some time next week. I'm not sure I'll always wear it, as I like the open air and my half-helmet seems like a reasonable compromise at town speeds, but the price was right and it should be very nice for Florida's version of "winter." I was wanting a yellow one, but didn't find one of acceptable quality in my price range. Especially one that has a internal flip-down "sunglass" visor and comes with a free pair of gloves. So matte black it is. I have another pair of gloves, and a phone holder, and a handlebar pad, on the way as well.

I haven't started ordering parts for the bike, since I won't know what all fits/works until I have the bike and/or the bike's user manual in front of me. This particular model seems to be new enough that there's not much about it on "Chinese scooter riders" forums, etc. I may order oil and gear oil, but there's really no hurry. I will probably have the scooter shop do the first "post-break-in" maintenance of that sort.

One thing I'll buy if necessary: A USB-powered digital speedometer. The Chinese scooters are notorious for their speedometers being 5-10 miles per hour "optimistic." I've got a speedometer app on my phone, but if there's room I'd rather have something both accurate and permanently mounted -- and the bike has a USB port. That's assuming my mechanic friend doesn't have some trick up his sleeve for calibrating the stock speedometer.

Once it's broken in and I have specs or can manually take measurements, the modifications begin:

• Performance air filter (tune the carburetor);
• Performance exhaust (tune the carburetor);
• Remove any extraneous emissions equipment (tune the carburetor);
• Upjet the carburetor or put on a bigger carburetor (and tune the carburetor);
• Oil cooler if I have any overheating problems;
• Slightly fatter tires at some point, but that may just be when the factory tires start nearing replacement time;
• New handlebars and handgrips if, for any reason, I don't like the factory ones;
• Bore kit or bigger engine if I'm still not happy with top speed, but want to stick with this bike.

My expectation is that all of that stuff will get done over the course of a year or more (probably more on the tires).

At some point, I also expect I'll decide to go "real motorcycle," and I intend to keep/get this thing in good enough shape to get decent money for it on the used market. But hopefully we're talking at least 2-3 years down the road.

The End (In More Than One Way)

Well, that wasn't so bad:

1. "We're about to start the propofol."
2. "OK, all done, let me get your discharge paperwork."

The prep/wait was the bad part. The one prior colonoscopy had been canceled because I wasn't "clear" enough,  so I really went at it big-time. Basically 36 hours of nothing but liquids, and I did laxatives and the prescription prep stuff (which wasn't as nasty as I remembered it being). That had my blood sugar bouncing all over the place, etc., and I just felt bad pretty much the whole time.

One polyp removed, lab work to come. Otherwise, all good.

Based on my digestive history (which is not something I've ever bothered mentioning to a doctor), I had kind of expected to hear something like "celiac" or "IBD" or "Crohn's" more so than "colon cancer." But none of that. Apparently my innards are in pretty good shape and I just have a terrible diet. Come back in three years unless that polyp is something terrible.

I'm somewhat torn between "they're always terrorizing me with stuff about my heart, liver, intestine, etc. and it always turns out to be nothing" and "Tom, you have a pronounced tendency toward health panics."

I think I'll be back in the swing of things by tomorrow. Right now I just want a nap (I grabbed a horrible fast food meal on the way home because I was hungry). I do feel a little more rested after being under, but part of the long prep was not much sleep because I was up every hour to drink liquids. I suspect three hours will just about set me right.

Wordle 1161 Hint

Hint: Today's Wordle sucks.

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First Letter: L

Well, That Artificial "Top of the World" Feeling from Fasting Didn't Last Long ...

A couple of hours ago, I thought I felt good enough to get a Garrison Center column out today.

Shortly after that, I started feeling a little slap-happy and decided maybe I couldn't pull it off.

Now, after several days of eating very little and 16 hours or so of nothing but liquids (with no sugars or carbs in them), I'm back to just feeling ... wobbly and kinda bad.

Oddly, last time I checked it, my blood sugar had been going up, not down. Keeping an eye on that, with a sugary clear liquid available if it falls precipitously (hey, I can still spell precipitously!). I usually record a blood sugar spike first thing in the morning. My doctor says that's my body's physical reaction to it going down overnight, it starts burning whatever to make glucose because it's going down. I'm guessing this is the same thing: My body says "oops, this guy isn't ingesting sugar/carbs, guess I'll make some out of fat or muscle."

So yeah, no column today, but tomorrow's "web-only" RRND is coming along fairly well.

Wordle 1160 Hint

Hint: You're cruel, Wordle creators! Today's puzzle is just beastly.

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First Letter: B

A Request For Comments

I hate it when I don't get a Garrison Center column out at the usual rate of three per week (minus one per month written by the wonderful Joel Schlosberg).

Hate. It.

And since many/most of the Garrison Center's supporters are also readers of this blog, I'd like their opinions.

My colonoscopy is scheduled for Friday.

Last time around, I got there and they sent me home because I wasn't "clear" enough. The solution to that was the "shit in a box, send it to a lab" thing, because I figured that having to do a longer "prep" just wasn't going to work due to my blood sugar considerations.

Now the colonoscopy isn't really optional, and I'm determined not to have it postponed again.

So, I've spent the last few days on a "softer foods" diet, when eating at all (I'm eating less), and frankly I'm already feeling lousy.

First thing tomorrow morning is the beginning of the "NO food, liquids/laxatives/etc. only," and I intend to be agressive with the liquids, etc.

I'm not sure, but I strongly suspect I may not be in any shape to write a coherent column tomorrow ... and as for Saturday, I just won't know until the time comes.

Most of my work is the kind of repetitive stuff I could almost do in my sleep, and I think I'll get that done.

So ... are you guys all right with me missing yet another column, maybe two? IMO that's a big ask, since I really only write maybe 140 per year. Let me know in comments.

If you're NOT okay with it, I may still miss the columns .... but I may also consider working up a list of "guest columnists" who are interested in irregular, short-notice, low-paying op-ed work.

Side notes:

Cox's Internet service has been fairly bad recently, and really bad for the last two days, with frequent and extended outages, making it even harder to get anything done reliably.

Yesterday's piece has already appeared the Orange County Register (and the, IIRC 12, papers in its associated chain), as well as papers in Mississippi and North Carolina, so we're obviously not doing too badly in the pickup area. Oddly, a search for title/opening line also leads, for some reason, to what appears to be an Asian pr0n site of some sort (don't click on this link -- on mouse hover, you'll notice that the URL reflects the column title, which hardly seems like coincidence -- if you don't want to see pictures of Asian women in various states of undress and sexual congress, and possibly pick up some malware). I have no explanation for that, unless it's that my columns are popular enough for pornographers/malware spreaders to think they can attract clicks with their titles.

Yes, It's Almost That Time ...

... time, that is, for the NFL season and ESPN's "Pigskin Pick'em" game. Here's an invite link for that game and the "Knappster versus the Field" group for if you'd like to test your prediction skills against mine.

First game: The Baltimore Ravens visit Arrowhead to lose to the Kansas City Chiefs on Thursday, September 5. Yes, that's a prediction. Naturally, I'll post all my game predictions before each week's kickoffs, and post a "yay, I was right most of the time" or "wow ... I had it all wrong" retrospective after the game week ends.

A Completely Different Kind of Motorcycle Post

Per Fox "News" [hat tip -- Steve Trinward collected this story for Rational Review News Digest]:

Harley-Davidson released a statement on Monday renouncing DEI and other controversial company initiatives in the wake of social-media outrage and withering pressure from longtime loyal bikers.  ... Harley-Davidson had faced grumblings for years from longtime customers, including hard-core bikers, who claimed that the Milwaukee-based company "used" them to build its "bad--s" brand, then abandoned them as the motorcycle's popularity expanded to upscale riders. The dissatisfaction exploded in July when social-media influencer Robby Starbuck outed several controversial internal woke policies at Harley.

I just don't care about any of that, and don't understand why "real bikers" would care about it either.

The bikes are good, or they're not good.

Harley-Davidson has a reputation for making very good motorcycles.

I don't choose to watch or not watch movies starring Sean Penn or Jon Voight or Jane Fonda or James Woods because of their politics. Why would I choose to buy or not buy a motorcycle because of the company's politics?

Yes, there are hypotheticals where I would make such a choice -- "our company donates 10% of its profits to revivifying the American Nazi Party and setting up camps in the southwest for the eventual second Holocaust" -- but outside such hypotheticals, I just want goods and services that I evaluate as "high-quality."

But hey, maybe there's an even bigger sell-off of used Harleys at low prices coming due to rider tantrums over politics. I already see quite a few heavily discounted Harleys out there. If someone wants to sell me a working/running Iron 883 in good condition for $500, I'll take the deal.

Wordle 1159 Hint

Hint: Gardeners and landscapers spread it around.

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First Letter: M

Ordered and Paid For

"Out the door" -- bike, taxes, tags, etc. -- $2,166.56.

Arriving late this week or early next, which functionally/probably means "next week," since I have that medical procedure on Friday and the dealership is closed on weekends (presumably they have a bit of assembly work, etc. to do on it when it arrives). They are open on Saturday "by appointment," so I suppose it might get here Friday and be pick-up-able Saturday. Which would be nice.

Wordle 1158 Hint

Hint: In a hurry to solve today's Wordle? Don't be. Put it off for a little while.

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First Letter: D

And Yet Another Update ...

... this time, inflating my post count by one instead of just inline, because why not?

Thanks to a reader/friend (he or she knows who he or she is and can reveal that if desired), I've got enough money to go pay for that bike tomorrow. Presumably there will be a wait for delivery. The scooter dealer is an Italica franchisee (or at least sells mainly Italica scooters when it's selling new ones), but that's not something he keeps in stock since his market is mostly college students who tend toward the 50cc rather than bigger. So he has to order it.

Hopefully by the time my rear end is recovered from the colonoscopy, it will be there and ready to ride home ... via the scenic route.

And Again With Bikes/Money

I heard from the scooter shop about the Italica Bulldog 150cc I mentioned and shared a photo of in the previous post.

He offered me a pretty nice "returning customer" discount to get it down to $2,166.56 "out the door" (bike, taxes/title/tag).

That's about $666.56 more than the maximum I wanted to spend ... but it is a new bike, one-year parts/labor warranty, and the type of platform I've been zeroing in on (Honda Navi clone). Also, I trust the guy to not sell me busted crap (that used 50cc has given me more than I had any right to ask of it), and I look forward to continuing the relationship by handing him more money instead of just asking him more questions.

I just need to either get another $966.56 together by tomorrow, or finance part or all of the bike. Not sure how long the delivery timeline is, and part or all of the payment might be deferred until delivery, but I'm not counting on that.

Update/Explanatory Note: Why did I suddenly get really hot on getting a bike and start bitching incessantly about it (if you think the blog is bad, you should hear me at home)? Self-analysis is always difficult, but let's review the timeline:

On August 3, I got the ColoGuard results, meaning "colonoscopy and prospective cancer diagnosis." 

Within a few days I was back to1)  looking at bikes (after a break of some time in thinking about them), 2) going to motorcycle school, 3) getting a motorcycle license, and 4) going nearly insane trying to find something.

So I suspect I'm sub-consciously giving in to a "do that thing you've wanted to do while you're still alive to do it" impulse.

And, a little more consciously, considering the possibility, between my health problems and Tamara's, that medical situations may eventually result in bankruptcy, so maybe I should make a fairly major purchase now instead of later.

Internal evidence for the latter is that it also occurred to me recently that I should finally try sky-diving, but I went with "buy a material object of  value" over "spend significant money on a brief experience and memory of no financial value."

If I jump out of an airplane, well, I've jumped out of an airplane, and if I survive I can spend the rest of my life knowing I conquered that fear. I can make both practical and recreational continuing use of a bike, and even sell it if I get tired of it.

It May Be Kind of an "Off" Week

No joy finding a bike this weekend.

Last night, we had our 19-year-old cat, Countess, euthanized. She'd been getting thinner and less energetic for some time, but over the last few days she was clearly just not enjoying life. Didn't seem to be in pain, but was having more trouble getting around, controlling her bladder, and finally seemed to be having some kind of minor seizures. It was just ... time. We enjoyed her company for five years after some idiots dropped her off at a rescue at 14 years old because their kid wanted a puppy (that was the bizarrely dumb story we got, anyway).

This week, I've got pre-op consult tomorrow and the "camera up your shitter" routine on Friday.

I'm still hoping to have a bike in the next 1-2 weeks. I've messaged the dealer I bought the used Italica from about the "out the door" cost of the new Italica Bulldog 150 (model presumably not included, image from Italica's social media):

If that's doable, I'll probably do it.

It's a 150cc clone of the 109cc Honda Navi. About the same top speed stock, but since it's actually a generic Chinese machine, there should be plenty of aftermarket parts (clutches, variators, carburetors, exhausts) available to inexpensively and incrementally get it up from its stock 45-50mph to, say, 60mph. Not a freeway bike, but good for smaller highway travel and plenty for around town.

If it's not doable, I'm still entertaining various used listings or an Amazon special. If the latter, I hope to get it ordered today or tomorrow on the off chance that Amazon has one in stock in Florida and it will get here by the weekend so I can have it put together in time to go get it tagged on Monday. I'm just trying to decide between the (cheaper, more my style) 125cc "cafe cruiser" or a (more expensive, but faster) 250cc "Enduro" style bike. Leaning toward the former, not because of the expense so much as because I prefer the cruiser platform and because it is also easily modded -- I've seen video where someone made it into a 250, so basically I'd have time to learn/grow on it and then make it "more bike."

I really, really, really, really hate dealing with people on Facebook marketplace. So far I've had one person simply never reply when I was trying to give him his asking price (the bike was still there and, so far as I know, unsold), and another act like they would take a good offer and then just pull the listing and not bother to tell me the bike was no longer listed until I asked when I could come see it/get it.

Wordle 1,157 Hint

Hint: A measuring instrument (for, say, water or electricity), or a unit of measure (for length).

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First Letter: M

Wordle 1156 Hint

Hint: Tall, thin, and probably awkward.

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First Letter: L

Wordle 1155 Hint

Hint: Today's Wordle might involve some combination of rain, snow, wind, and/or Imperial troopers.

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First Letter: S

A South Park / Seinfeld / Different Strokes Reverie

Part 1:

Part 2:

Explanation:

Got to the Honda dealership to inquire as to the $1,396 2023 Honda Navi. It was gone.

Guy said they might be able to find another one. Same price -- "about $3,000 out the door."

I'm used to the price of a vehicle consisting of the price of the vehicle, plus the Danegeld for permission from the government to own/drive it (taxes, title fees, and tag fees).

But this would have been the very first time I had ever purchased a "new" motor vehicle from a dealership.

Dealerships, it seems, charge something called a "dealer fee."

And something called "freight," even though it has nothing to do with shipping the vehicle to me, but rather the previous process of someone else shipping the vehicle to them.

In the case of a $1,400 vehicle, apparently those two things come to nearly as much as the advertised price of the vehicle.

IMO, the advertised price of the vehicle should be the actual price of the vehicle.

So anyway, unless I wake up tomorrow and suddenly decide to buy the $1,200 (including shipping to me) 225cc "cafe cruiser," I'll definitely be sticking to the used market.

Sucks. I'd hoped to put 100 miles on a bike tomorrow by way of breaking it in and familiarizing myself with it.

Wow, That Was Quick ...

I figured the colonoscopy would be weeks or months away. Instead, it's next Friday, which is timing (Fridays, I'm basically "off work" for the most part).

Of course, there's a "pre-op evaluation" on Tuesday, which may impact my ability to keep a full work schedule. Guess we'll see.

Hopefully I'll be riding a NEW BIKE to the pre-op evaluation (I think that is going to happen either this afternoon or tomorrow morning), but since they give you the good drugs for the actual procedure, I guess I'll let Tamara drive me for that.

Between myself and Tamara, it looks like we have a full medical dance card through the end of the year. She's scheduled for thyroid surgery in late October, and we still don't have her ticker problem (bradycardia) figured out. Hopefully the colonoscopy on me returns a "have another one [insert period of time] from now," rather than "make sure your will is up to date, and hope you enjoy vomiting."

Spent The Morning At Scooter Dealerships ...

... and I'm not finding anything I want in my price range.

The Clash 200cc owner's husband is out of town, so that would be a "Sunday at the earliest" thing, followed by sitting at DMV on Monday to get plates.

I'm talking with Tamara by email at the moment about just going ahead and financing part of a new bike.

It's last year's model, the Honda Navi, for a little under $1,400. I've got $1,200 in my pocket, and the tentative plan is to put $500 down, pay for the title/tags right there at the dealership, and finance the rest (payments probably under $40 per month for 12 months, and I would likely pay it off early).

The Navi is a ... scootercycle. One dealer I watched on video called it a cross between a scooter and the Honda Grom. It has a motorcycle form factor, but an "automatic" CVT transmission like a scooter, running behind a 109cc single cylinder carbureted engine (probably the same engine as the Grom. Top speed, stock, 50-55mph, but 60+ if (over time) I install a "performance" variator/clutch and exhaust (both very easy to do, even for me, probably even without a mechanic's assistance), and maybe even a little more if I buy a CDI that doesn't restrict RPMs (that's just a matter of disconnecting a box and connecting a new box), all before even thinking about up-jetting the carb.

No clutch, but motorcycle style brakes (front brake on the left handlebar, rear brake on a right-foot pedal), which would be good for getting used to motorcycle riding.

So:

Still not a long-distance freeway bike, but definitely fine for country highway use. And I would trust a new Honda to make a thousand mile round trip if I didn't abuse it. With sufficient mods, it might even be good for, say, 50-mile freeway jaunts.

Also, Navis seem to hold their value. I'm seeing used 2022s on offer for more than this new 2023 is going for on clearance. I suspect that if I ever decide I want to move up, I'll be able to get $1,000+ for it three years from now.

Wordle 1154 Hint

Hint: You might wear one on a bad knee, or several on crooked teeth.

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First Letter: B

Thursday Is, More Or Less, My Friday ...

Not really, but sort of.

On Thursdays, I usually write/publish/submit a Garrison Center column (sometimes I'll get an earlier start on the writing part), work on Friday's Rational Review News Digest, do my usual social media work and comment moderation at Antiwar.com, but try to get everything set up so that when I get up at 4:30am on Friday, I have very little to do and am "done with the week" (except for periodic comment section checks and a weekend column) by 7am or so, until Sunday afternoon. I'm at a stopping/break point right now, which is when I do my blog posting.

Anyway, all that means Friday is "my Saturday," when I have time to do things like try to hack the yard down to size, go see a movie ... or sit at DMV waiting to get a vehicle registered and tagged.

So today, I'm awaiting a firm reply (I got "sounds good, but have to talk to my husband, I'll get back to you") on 1) a tentative offer of slightly less than the ad demanded and 2) a time this evening to go look at/test/potentially buy that Vitacci Clash 200 EFI scooter. They wanted $1,300. I said I couldn't do more than $1,200, which is what the 1981 Honda CM200 Twinstar is priced at (I finally got a quote out of a dealership on a used Kymco Like 150i, but it's out of my price range).

If the offer is acceptable, I'll look at the scooter before I look at the Honda. If the scooter is acceptable, I won't bother looking at the Honda. If things ain't right, I'll look at the Honda. In either case, I hope to get a bike home tonight and then go to DMV in the morning to get it all nice and legal.

BUT!

The guy at the place where I bought the 50cc told me that if I was ever looking for something bigger, let him know and he could probably find something. I messaged him this morning with "I'm looking for something 168cc or larger, in decent shape, for $1,500 or less out the door."

"Out the door" means I don't have to sit at DMV. The title, etc. gets done right there at his shop, I get a temp tag, and he gives me a yell when the permanent plate is ready to be picked up. So if I hear back from him with something really good today, I can just drop by his shop tomorrow and drive away on something that won't get me pulled over.

In either case, I'll take care of insurance somewhere in there (no insurance, no title/tag).

As you can probably tell, I'm still agonizing over all this.

Functionally, both of the main vehicles under consideration are "country highway, but not freeway" vehicles. I suspect I could comfortably carry a little more cargo on the scooter, but I'd get by on either one.

Mechanically, it's a wash. I can actually work on a scooter transmission, while the motorcycle transmission would be a mystery to me. On the other hand, I can mess with a carburetor like the bike has, while the scooter is fuel-injected and has sensors and electronics. Fortunately my mechanic lives right across the street.

So it's really about my fear of driving a manual transmission bike versus my personal style/presentation. I think I look more like a "biker" than like a "mod" (the set traditionally associated with scooters). You know -- fat and bearded and if nobody looks too closely plausibly muscular, rather than thin and sophisticated.

I told Tamara this morning that if I get the scooter, I probably don't deserve to rock the mustache. At least unless I want to thin it out to a pencilish thing.

I think I would be safer and more comfortable on the scooter.

I think I'd look more menacing and mysterious on the motorcycle.

I'll probably emphasize safety and comfort over looking like a mean motherfucker. I mean, I'm getting old. And also, scooter clubs sound a little less tense than biker gangs if I want to get social.

But that might change, now or later. And at least I theoretically know how to ride a motorcycle now, so I suppose I could borrow a friend's when I want to add a little spice to my life.

Wordle 1153 Hint

Hint: An oak, in embryonic form.

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First Letter: A

Yes, More Bike Ponderings ...

And why not? I'm well on track to my "650 posts for the year" goal, and will get back to different kinds of content goodness once I get this burr out from under my fur.

This morning, I was about ready to say "screw it" and just order that 125cc "cafe cruiser" from Amazon, instead of a scooter

I'm scared of a "real motorcycle," but I keep coming up on "if you don't get over being scared, you lose." And since I no longer have higher-ranked NCOs, et al. yelling at me to do things like jump out of helicopters, off cliffs, and so forth, winning or losing versus the fear is entirely up to me.

Also, when it comes to personal presentation, I just look more like a "biker" than like a mod.

I just found a 1981 Honda CM200, local, for $1200. It's exactly the bike that one experienced rider friend started on, loves, and recommends.

Top speed about 71mph unless it's been re-sprocketed up front; with a change from 15 to 16 sprocket teeth, 75mph and comfortable 60mph cruise.

It's the kind of bike I wouldn't take on long freeway rides, but which (after a little while getting  used to riding and watching for any problems) I would expect to be able to drive 500 miles each way on smaller highways without worrying that it would shit the bed on me.

Financially, I could just barely swing it if I was willing to knock my personal cash reserve down. I'm iffy on that, and would appreciate any assistance (see "support" links in right sidebar).

Another possibility: If you're interested in buying some Bitcoin at a discount, or in getting any of the gift cards available at Bitrefill.com (that is a referral link -- we each get $5 in BTC if you join through me and spend $200), also at a discount, let me know. If you're someone I know/trust, I will send you the Bitcoin or gift card, then you can pay me cash via PayPal at, say, 10% off (current market value for Bitcoin, face value for gift card). I'm willing to liquidate up to $1200 in Bitcoin to make this happen. Email me at thomaslknapp at protonmail.com to make that happen.

Pic, if Facebook doesn't stop hotlinks:

Update, 3:15pm: Looks like things are moving. I just did a BTC transaction with a friend as described above. Hopefully the bike will 1) still be available by the time I'm able to get the cash out and 2) be what it's advertised as. If not, I'll find something else in the same price range.

Update, 9:25pm: I'm becoming less certain about that bike, at that price point. I see one missing part, and one part that likely needs replacing, and online I'm seeing a total of at least $300 to replace them, not including any labor that I might have to pay a mechanic to do. That gets the bike to $1,500 ... and a friend tells me he's been seeing fully restored ones for $2,200. That's before I've even evaluated (to the extent that I can) its mechanical condition. I'm hoping to buy something by Monday. Developing ...

Wordle 1152 Hint

Hint: Where you'd find sailors on leave.

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First Letter: S

Bikes I Might Want, But Might Not Be Able To Swing Right Now

Locally, I found a lightly used Vitacci Clash 200 EFI for $1,300. Top speed in excess of 60mph, stock, and it gets very good reviews as a scooter. It's a "bought it for my wife, she just doesn't ride it" situation. I could buy a new Clash for about $1800 including shipping ... and then I'd have to assemble it, etc. ... and the reviews on Amazon, etc. regarding shipment, assembly, missing or defective parts, etc. aren't that encouraging. This one is "broken in" and supposedly just fine functionally. Which is how I want my bikes, especially if they're Chinese scooters, as customer support seems to be a major issue with those.

I'm waiting on a quote for a used Kymco Like 150i (very reputable Taiwanese manufacturer) from a dealership. I suspect I'd like that one even better than the Clash, and I'd be titled/temp-tagged leaving the dealership instead of spending another couple of hours dealing with DMV.

Either of these bikes, stock, would be great for town riding and country highways, as well as reasonably short freeway rides.

BUT!

$1300 or more cash, plus taxes/tags, turns out to be something I can't manage at the moment after all. There was some ... family miscommunication ... about money I thought was being set aside, and it would crater my personal cash reserve to that media-touted "a $400 emergency would drain me completely" point.

My alternative is "turn Bitcoin into gift cards, or finance with monthly payments, and risk the Amazon/Walmart 'shipped partially assembled' thing that seems to generate most poor reviews."

As you may be able to tell from the above, I'm leaning back toward a scooter rather than a motorcycle, for a few reasons:

1. Lower learning curve. Yes, I passed the basic rider course on a Honda Rebel 250 and was able to accomplish basic shifting, etc. But I'm not good at it yet, and it would take me some time to get good at it and be comfortable riding. I've put about a thousand miles on the small scooter, and the only thing that scares me about it is not being able to get to a 50mph minimum to "keep up with traffic." Which, of course, a bigger scooter will fix. Feet on the floor instead of handling shifting and rear brake means I can pay more attention to the road. I'm not wanting to go racing, mudding, etc. I'm wanting to ride the roads on both business and pleasure.
2. Wheels. Most of the motorcycles in even my highest conceivable price range have large wheels (I prefer to sit lower), and old-fashioned spoked wheels at that. Spoked wheels require tuning and, I suspect, are more prone to bend/collapse in any kind of collision than smaller alloy wheels. I'd like to keep it at 14" or under, alloy.

The only up side I'm seeing to a motorcycle is that most of them offer easier access to the innards, so that you don't spend half an hour taking off the outer panels to do modifications. And I expect that any bike I get will end up being modified -- maybe not a bigger bore, but various little things that offer at least slight performance benefits. Since getting in there is a drag, I'd be tempted to do multiple things at once instead of taking it a step at a time. But I'd resist that temptation. Baby steps, you know.

If I get a scooter that can do 60+ mph stock, it's plausible that I can eventually -- eventually, I'm not in a huge hurry -- boost that to 70+, maybe with the ability to cruise at 60 without straining the engine ... which would make longer freeway trips a doable thing.

Again -- right sidebar links if anyone would like to help me get to "I can fork over $1600 or so, including taxes and tags, to buy something in person locally."

Wordle 1151 Hint

Hint: A horse's "no" vote.

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First Letter: N

The Waiting Is Not Really the Hardest Part ...

... but I still don't like it. More than an hour to actually get to a window at the tax collector's office -- then less than five minutes to pay the Danegeld and get a shiny new license with motorcycle endorsement.*

After that, I did a little window shopping. One scooter repair shop that says they sell bikes appeared to be closed. At another, the only bike in my desired power range was at the bottom of that range (150cc scooter), and above the top of my desired price range ($1,800 not including tax/tag costs; I want to top out at $1,500 total). It was a nice bike -- an orange-colored, air-cooled Kymco, which I believe reader Thane is partial to. I think the price was probably right for the brand/condition, and I suppose I may check the couch cushions for additional cash and go back there if I don't find something more to my liking on both power and price.

Thing is, I can buy a brand new Honda Navi -- rides like a motorcycle except no shifting -- for about $1,400. Top speed about 50mph ... and maybe $300 in modifications (exhaust, variator, clutch, CDI ... to be able to get 60-65mph out of it. But I wouldn't want to ride a Navi on the freeway for multiple reasons, including that top speed not being a viable long-distance cruising speed. So I'd be a little better situated than I am now, but not as well-situated as I'll be if I can find something in at least the 250cc range for a decent price.

I'm hoping to have something purchased by the end of this week ... and anyone who's interested in how fast I can go, whether I end up dying in a ball of fire and hail of twisted metal, etc., should hit one of the support links in the right sidebar to help take the financial edge off a little.

* Yes, I had to wait an hour to give them money for permission to do something I've already established to their satisfaction I'm capable of doing. It is my opinion that Florida state law should be modified to make that run in the other direction if you're kept waiting. They get 15 minutes from the time you check in. At the 15-minute mark, the clock starts running, and when they finally call you to the counter, there's a printer already printing out a check to you in the amount of the median Florida hourly wage for every hour and additional fraction of an hour you've waited.

Pro Tip On Getting Educated In Pretty Much Anything You Have Even Minimal Aptitude For

This is the kind of thing I guess credentials need to be put forth for:

I had an "OK" high school career. Not the highest GPA, but a 30 ACT, 1310 (IIRC) SAT, and 99th percentile nationwide on the PSAT.

I had a terrible university career -- dropped out at midterm of the first semester with a practically non-existent GPA because really I was far more about drinking, fucking, etc. than I was about school.

Since then, however, I've taken a few college credit courses with a perfect GPA. I also successfully graduated Marine Corps boot camp, Infantry Training School (with perfect exam scores on both 81mm and 60mm mortar), Nuclear/Biological/Chemical Survey Monitor school, and shooting coach/marksmanship instructor school (honor graduate in the "teaching" category). And various work-related courses at different jobs. And yesterday, of course, a motorcycle basic rider course.

A crap ton of online courses, too, in everything from HTML (back in the early 1990s) to COVID-19 contact tracing (2020), but that's not really applicable here, because I'm talking about meatspace classroom/field stuff.

At no point since 1985 have I failed a meatspace course of instruction.

The pro tip:

Listen to your instructors.

Yes, it is really that simple.

If you have zero aptitude for math or science, you are not going to get your PhD in physics just by listening to your instructors.

And yes, occasionally you'll have an instructor who can't, for whatever reason, teach well (for example, in that terribly failed university career, I had an algebra teacher for whom English was at best a second language, whose accent was so thick, and who spoke so fast, that nobody in the class could understand more than one out of five words he said -- he clearly knew what he was talking about, but his students had to try to figure it all out from the textbook because they weren't getting anything from him).

But if it's anything you have even a smidgen of aptitude for, and if the instructors are even baseline competent/understandable, listening to the instructors will almost always get you 95% or more of the way to passing (and actually absorbing/retaining the material).

The other 5% is reviewing what you've been taught before testing to make damn sure you've retained it ... and asking the instructor questions as needed, either during class or between class and test.

The Marine Corps uses (or at least did when I was in) took a "mastery learning" approach. If at least 80% of the students didn't establish through testing that they'd retained 80% of the material, the problem was with the instructor, not with the students. Course design emphasized step-by-step progression with frequent review, and circling back if the students didn't seem to be getting Step C and how/why it was anchored in Steps A and B. It worked.

Wordle 1150 Hint

Hint: Row, row, row (or sail) your boat of a particular type ...

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First Letter: S

I Highly Recommend Levi's 501 Jeans ...

... if you anticipate the possibility that you just might go down while riding a motorcycle.

So, I had my first motorcycle wipeout today, at probably 15 mph, for the obvious and stupidest of reasons -- I applied the brakes when the front wheel wasn't straight.

The good old 501s took a tear near the knee, but underneath them I got only the very mildest abrasion.

Slightly worse abrasion on my left arm near the elbow, even there was no visible tear in the light long-sleeve Walmart Grateful Dead t-shirt I was wearing.

Oh, and I passed the test, graduated the Motorcycle Safety Foundation approved Basic Rider Course, and will be licensed to ride a motorcycle once I make it over to DMV, show them my course card, and fork over some more money.

I highly recommend the Gainesville Motorcycle Safety Training School. The particular instructors I had, Brian and Jayson, were quite good at explaining what to do and how to do it, and they were also friendly and understanding. The most frequent admonition that I received or heard someone else receive to be honest, was "relax, you've got this," but they were also very clear with explanations of what someone had done incorrectly to result in a poor outcome (I was one of two people who laid a bike down during the course, but also stalls, shifting problems, etc. -- every problem someone had, they got a clear explanation of what to do about it).

So, the next steps are paying the license endorsement fee and getting a bike. This, as usual, is a developing story.

Graduate with scooter (and torn 501s), demonstrating why something larger is a good idea:

Wordle 1149 Hint

Hint: If you have one of these with tea, jam, and clotted cream, there's a good chance you're British.

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First Letter: S

I Am Definitely Feeling My Age Today

Or, "Why There May Not Be a Weekend Garrison Center Column."

I just got home from four hours of wrestling a Honda Rebel 250 around for the "riding" portion of the required motorcycle course to get my license.

The 250 is not a large bike (about 300 pounds), but there's also the added "wearing out" factor that comes with doing anything new and different. I am dog-tired (and, because sunscreen just didn't occur to me, sunburned), and will be heading off to bed soon. If there's a Garrison Center column for the weekend, it will get written tomorrow afternoon or evening, but what I will probably do instead is skip it and then not take a column off for Labor Day.

The good news:

1. Only one person in my class wiped out, and it wasn't me (the guy was not injured; just one of those things).
2. Only one person in my class scored 100% on the Florida written license exam, and it was me.

The not bad per se but somewhat interesting news:

1. If I had it to do all over again, I'd have just gone to this course before purchasing a scooter. To the extent that I had difficulties, they had to do with trying to unlearn scooter behaviors. On the scooter, each of the two hand grips engages a brake. On a motorcycle, the left hand grip engages the clutch (a left-side foot lever shifts gears), while the right hand grip engages the front brake (and a right-side foot pedal engages the rear brake). Nothing insurmountable, but just a little extra work versus learning the motorcycle way from the beginning.

I'm about 90% decided against the 125cc "cafe cruiser" that was on my Amazon Wish List. If I go motorcycle, I want to go 250cc bare minimum (I've already established first-hand that I can handle it) and possibly as high as 500cc.

After completing the course tomorrow (and presumably passing and being able to get my motorcycle license), I'll start thinking harder about whether I want to go the "bigger scooter" route or the motorcycle route. I'm leaning ever-so-slightly toward the latter, but I do love scooters.

Wordle 1148 Hint

Hint: Instead of using the US Army's term (today's Wordle), the US Navy and US Marine Corps refer to the person doing this job as a "corpsman."

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First Letter: M

Then Again ...

... the Honda Navi is more expensive than that Amazon "cafe cruiser," but has about the same top speed if kept stock, a scooter-style continuously variable transmission, seems to be fairly easy to mod for some speed increases, and if I can find a used one locally it would probably end up being a little cheaper altogether.

I'm putting off any final decision at least until after this weekend's riding course. That course will, if nothing else, tell me whether I'm even interested in something with a manual transmission.

Wordle 1147 Hint

Hint: Might be 437.5 grains, or could be 31.1034768 grams, depending.

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First Letter: O

Wake Me Up When September ...

ends? Begins? Is halfway over?

I just can't place much stock in headlines like "Shock Poll Shows Harris Opening Up Lead Against Trump" right now.

Not just because it's a national poll in an election where a handful of "swing states" will make the difference.

And not just because the difference is basically margin of error.

We're still very much in the honeymoons/bumps period of this election cycle -- three of the major parties' four national ticket candidates weren't even in the race a month ago. They're putting on their initial shows, and taking their initial pokes at each other.

Unless it's just been a blowout from the beginning, early August is way too early to expect polling to be very predictive. After mid-September, barring bizarre and unpredictable events, things settle down and the picture starts to become more clear. Which doesn't mean we know what will happen, especially if it's neck and neck.

Wordle 1146 Hint

Hint: Would you like pomodoro or Alfredo on your Wordle today? Either way, it's covered.

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First Letter: S

If Not For Distance ...

... I'd be strongly considering this 2006 Honda Rebel 250 or this 2001 Honda Reflex NSS 250. The former is really at the top of my price range, the latter well within it. But either one would require going to a distant location, evaluating the bike, and, at least in the case of the scooter (personal sale vs. dealer), likely riding it home without even temp tags.

If either one was within 50 miles, I might be all over it. But most of the stuff I'm seeing on e.g. Craigslist that's in my area has a big gap in the middle -- lots of 50cc scooters, lots of motorcycles that are either out of my price range, or quite a bit bigger than I'd like, or both.

OK, I'm Taking the Plunge ...

... although I'm basically in the air midway between the diving board and the water.

I'm scheduled to take the riding portions of the basic motorcycle safety class on Saturday and Sunday. There will be some online coursework between now and then. I paid $125 -- half the normal fee -- as a deposit just now, and will pay another $100 (because I'm a veteran, yay) on Saturday.

Which means that by Monday I should be street legal to drive any size bike instead of just 50cc and under.

Which means I can start shopping for a bike.

At the moment, I find myself leaning harder and harder toward this one (not an affiliate link). Hard enough, in fact, that I've got it on my Amazon Wish List just in case anyone wants to spend about $1,300, including shipping, on me.

It's a cheap Chinese 125cc "Cafe Cruiser" with a listed top speed of 55mph (and YouTube reviewers seem to be able to get that out of it, stock).

The reviews are VERY mixed, especially with respect to things like turn signals breaking off, etc. On the other hand, it looks like aftermarket stuff -- more on that in a minute -- is quite inexpensive. I'm already thinking of it as a "project" bike.

Of course, I was thinking of the 50cc scooter as a "project scooter," too, and never have gone ahead and installed a new carburetor and big bore kit in it.

This is different, for a couple of reasons.

One reason is that a 143cc or even 155 cc bore kit on this bike would make a real difference (in at least the 10-mile-per-hour range), while on the 50cc the videos I've watched seem to indicate you're really only looking at 3-5mph gain by going from 50cc to 80cc.

Another is that my "euro" style scooter requires a bunch of taking off of panels, etc. to get at anything, while this is a typical 125cc motorcycle where everything is just hanging out there for easy access. So if I want to get its speed up, I should be able to do that fairly cheaply and with a lot less time spent on the work.

Not that I'm planning to really start modifying it immediately. If I do anything, it will involve removing some power-reducing emissions stuff and replacing the air filter box with a "performance" cone type filter. Those both appear to be ten-minute jobs.

I'm not really worried about increased speed until I actually get used to the thing and have it well broken in. Until I reach that point, the modifications will likely consist of things like replacing the cheap, easily broken turn signals with cheap, not as easily broken LEDs, possibly looking at a different set of handlebars, and doing things with its appearance (the mandatory black X on the headlight, quite possibly painting the fenders and tank a different color, and just maybe having the seat upholstered in real leather if that's not wildly expensive). Oh, and finding a decent pannier and/or rear rack to be able to carry things.

I may find that I'm perfectly happy with the engine/speed/performance in "stock" configuration. Even if I could make reasonable freeway speeds, I'm not sure I want to cruise I-75 sandwiched between 18-wheelers; 55mph is plenty for the smaller highways, and would let me get in and out of town without holding up traffic.

Or, I may find something different, new or used, bigger and/or in scooter configuration rather than motorcycle with manual transmission. Especially if nobody wants to buy this one for me.

Speaking of which, one fairly early mod on this bike would be changing the gearing, which apparently amounts to buying and installing a single sprocket behind a single panel. This is a four-speed with, reviewers say, a very low first gear because lots of these bikes are sold in mountainous South American countries; I don't expect to have to ride over Pike's Peak or anything on it. Apparently there's also a kind of shifter that's cheap, easily installed, and easier to use than the one on this bike.

Update, 5:15pm: I went ahead and powered right through the required online course today (which means I'm behind on regular work -- but I'll get caught up even if it means a later than usual bedtime). I have to go do the physical riding parts on Saturday and Sunday in order to get the Florida driver's license motorcycle endorsement. Then it's just a matter of getting a bike.

Trump Should Stick With The Original Plan

Per AP:

Donald Trump says he is pulling out of a scheduled September debate with Vice President Kamala Harris on ABC and wants them to face off on Fox News, making it increasingly unlikely that the candidates will confront each other on stage before the November election.

Harris is calling Trump chicken, which is neither unexpected nor unfair.

On the other hand, instead of "pulling out" of the ABC debate, Trump should have simply announced (and should issue a correction announcing) that he will happily take part in the scheduled ABC event, if his agreed opponent -- Joe Biden -- shows up.

If I schedule a game of tennis with you, I'm not agreeing to play against your next-door neighbor's nephew's girlfriend's cousin if you back out. Your next-door-neighbor's nephew's girlfriend's cousin is going to have to come to a different scheduling/venue agreement with me if she wants a game (no, I don't actually play tennis).